Sleepless Night

Yesterday evening was quite fun, going friend's house party, eat nasi kerabu which was one of my favourite hometown dish. Thanks a lot friends~ if not, i will end up sitting in my house 24-hours like a security guard.

I slept late in the night, about 1am. But i keep woke up from my dreams, bad dreams. I didnt know why i will feel so insecure, so lonely and so desperate. Maybe my heart are not yet prepare to face the cruel reality. Isn't sometimes reality is too cruel for us??? What kept appearing on my mind is my going-to-start-soon Form 6 life. I really scare i couldn't make it. Thinking of that, i remember how my most-trusted subject turned me down, Pendidikan Moral. The moment i took the slip peperiksaan, i was paralised, doomed, oh my god, why? i thought it might be account or additional math that got B3. At that moment, my mind went blank, what happened? After went back home, i call my cousin and broke down into tears......... my mum think that i should go rechecking, so did i, but yeaterday, i received my rechecking result's letter, it turn out to be "KEKAL", ohh!!! It is so hard to accept, i just hope that they can send me back my paper, i wanted to know what the stupid question that i did wrong....

Just 2 hours more, i will have to go back to school, to register myself for form 6. Form 6 life was so unpredictable for me. Will it turn out to be a colourful one? an enjoyable one?or it will turn out to be a dark one? With almost 90% of friends dissapear...i dont think my cheerful smile will ever appear on my face again. Will it end out to be a stressful one? or a normal one? For me, what i want is only a peaceful life, a normal life that give me the chance to study and put most of my concentration on my study and not other thing else. Lord, please help me!

Besides all the passive idea on my mind, i still think that form 6 life will able to change my life PerspeCtive, my point of View and my StyLe. I also think form 6 life will make me more mature and make me prepare myself fully to face the life in the future. What i wish now is to put all the concentration on my study and do as well as i can in Form 6. I hope to rebuild my self-confident as soon as possible. It is not the end yet, i know, it is not The End, It just a START!!!